Moments from our Masters Weekend

I can't quite kick this sick feeling of how Jordan Spieth imploded on the second nine at Augusta today. My hope is that posting some happier memories of our Masters Weekend will sweeten the sour.

We'll see how that works out for me.

FRIDAY
On Friday, I asked the boys if there was anything they wanted to pray about or anything they needed God to help them with or that their friends needed God to help them with.

Jones responded, "How 'bout Mouseketoodles? ... everybody say, 'Oh, TOOOOO-dles!"

I'm not sure if Toodles needed help or, more likely, if he heard the world "help" and immediately assumed a Mouseketool would be the quickest way to solve whatever mystery presented itself.

Still, it was funny.

It was also funny when we were about to leave the house, and I said to Jones, "Where's your jacket?" He pointed to a pair of striped pajamas on the den floor and said, 'That's not my jacket. That's my cute jammies."

It was NOT funny when Jones had a massive potty accident that included not only WETTING himself but also ... you know. When I went in to ask what had happened, he very sweetly said, "I sorry. It's my fault, Mama. I made a mistake." Suddenly, in spite of the disgusting job ahead of me, I couldn't get upset at him, because I was so proud of his willingness to genuinely apologize and admit his fault without being told to.

A little later, and because we had, like, LITERALLY NOTHING TO EAT AT THE HOUSE, I decided to take the boys out to lunch and let them both sit in big (READ: not high) chairs to see how they'd do. They did INCREDIBLY well. They stayed in their seats - which I think has been brought about by my playing Enforcer when they sit at their Easter-present picnic table. They know there's a price to be paid if they take their tiny hineys off the hard plastic bench, and that seems to have paid off when we went out to eat on Friday.

Glory, glory, hallelujah!

I also made them order their own drinks and meals. They did great with this, too. It took word-by-word instruction, but still, they did it, and I was so, so proud. I was NOT, however, brave enough to try this again - the seat part, anyway - at lunch after church today, but maybe I'll feel all wild and crazy at the beach next weekend.

"I'll get the door for you, Mama."
Jeremy has done a GREAT job of
teaching him to hold the door.
He doesn't always do it,
but he does it often enough
to make me really proud. 

SATURDAY
The wind was HOWLING yesterday morning. It actually woke me up it was so brutal. When I got Jones out of bed, he said, "THAT sounds like a tractor engine!"

During our Bible time in the morning, I read about Day Five of Creation. Trying to make things relevant, I said, "When we go to the beach and see the fish, God made those! He even made the pink whale (which is a character on a cartoon Jones loves)!" Jones looked at me incredulous and said, "The pink whale ate Baby Jesus?"

Remember when he thought they put Jesus in a WHALE after He came off the cross? I'm guessing the tale of Jonah has made a "big, giant" impact on Jones. Payton was the same way. He LOVED that account - but would always correct people when they said Jonah was swallowed by a whale. "It was a big fish," he'd say. And, according to the Scripture, he was right!

Saturday afternoon, I was vacuuming. As soon as I got started, Jones said, "Go, Mama! Go!" like he was in the infield at Talladega. He then pointed at the evidence of my strokes, and said, "Look, Mama! Tracks like wet footprints." THIS, I'm guessing, is owed to another cartoon - whether it's Stooby Stoo or some mystery episode of "the Clubhouse," I don't know, but I'm pretty sure he was ready to solve something when he saw the unfamiliar tracks in our den.

Later, we were watching the Masters, and Jordan did something awesome, and I got all choked up. Jones saw this and asked, "Are you happy, Mama?" "Yes," I nodded. He answered, "I'm happy. I happy, too. Like you."

He then brought in his golf bag, which he really doesn't play with much at all. I assumed he'd been inspired by the Masters to pick up his sticks. Turns out, he thought it was a vacuum cleaner. True to his Felix Unger form, he was keeping things clean.

SUNDAY

On the drive home from church, Jones asked this ... 

How could I resist?

Finally, Jones wasn't allowed to watch cartoons all afternoon, because of the Masters being on. He didn't even complain about this fact, which made me really proud (he did spend about fifteen minutes streaming John Deere videos on YouTube). As soon as coverage from Augusta ended, I said, "okay. Buddy. You can watch a 'toon." He excitedly said, "Now, it's MY pick! now it's MY pick, and I pick Sheriff Callie!" which, by the way, he is REALLY in to these days - like the last three days of this week, he's wanted to watch nothing but. 

And have I mentioned how Freddie calls bear hugs "CHOCOLATE bear hugs?" NO idea where that comes from, but I'm still trying for that elusive video of him saying it.

Okay, so those are the highlights of our Masters Weekend. I DO feel somewhat better now than I did when the Tournament ended. I sure hope Jordan Spieth can say the same.